Post by Deleted on Jun 11, 2015 12:31:44 GMT -5
Spottedsky padded into his leader's den, not really feeling a certain emotion at this point. So much has happened in such a short amount of time that Spottedsky could barely even remember if he had eaten that day. He had no one to talk to about it either, which certainly didn't help matters. It was hard for him to open up to others with so many of his close clanmembers suddenly disappearing or not even showing a slight interest in him. His two apprentices had disappeared not too long from each other, and they both were so similar. It broke his heart, and it often made him debate whether or not Starclan wanted him to receive someone to teach. Perhaps they did not think he was ready for tall order, and maybe they thought he needed to believe in himself before he could tell a cat younger than him, more inexperienced in him that Spottedsky was worthy of teaching. Was Spottedsky the one was to prove himself or was it his apprentices that were not worthy? No, it couldn't have been their fault. They were only of young age, with such a long life ahead of them. Spottedsky has grown too old for his body, and it made him quite sad. He was an elder trapped in an elder apprentice's body.
His denmates were probably still awaiting to receive their warrior name while he had already achieved his full name so many moons ago. Had they attempted to visit him? Had their ever checked up on him to see how he was doing or to see if he was fine? No, they hadn't. He didn't even know if they were happy for him or not, being a medicine cat and all. They hadn't spoke to him since the ceremony that led him here. Even his own sister, Maplepaw, who was the only that opened his eyes to this option of life had never bothered to confide in him or to talk to him. Spottedsky thought that a family was supposed to be there even if there was nothing to be there about, but so far, no one had spoken a single word at him. What a family he had.
He had no one to confide in. That was the jist of his life story. He had all of his thoughts in his mind, and if he had a quarter for every thought he held inside of him, he wouldn't know what to do with all them. I mean, what was a cat supposed to do with Twoleg currency? However, he was at a breaking point. He wanted to get these thoughts off his chest and make them all worth nothing. but with no one to confide in, it was hard to do so.
That's where his leader came in. He could talk to Bramblestar without having to worry about the tom dying on him or disappearing suddenly from his life. Surely, he had quite a bit of lives left. Now now, Spottedsky wasn't going to use his leader just for the benefit of having someone to talk to. He may not be a tom that was social and could tell others' feelings, but he knew something was bothering his leader. It was so apparent, that it made Spottedsky want to pounce on Bramblestar and comfort him, nuzzle him, tell him everything was going to be alone. The thought was absurd, of course, since Spottedsky couldn't have those feelings towards his leader. These were just feelings of 'I want to help' and nothing more than that.
He stood at the entrance of the den, and the light filtered in behind him. You could see his scrawny bones and that he hadn't eaten for a while. His rare calico fur was misgroomed and sticking up everywhere. He had seemed not to tidy himself for a long while as his worries had gotten the better of him. He had bags under his beautiful brown eyes, which, by now, were dulled with no expression. His tail was drooping, dragging along side the dirt. It made a trail, and it dirtied his tail in the process. At this point, Spottedsky could care less about his appearance. He just worried about his and Bramblestar's own mental health.
"Bramblestar," he croaked, his voice hoarse and much too mature for a young tom like him, "We... we need each other right now. May I come in and discuss some personal matters with you?"