And this is where I sign off

[Deleted]

Hey guys. So I've been thinking lately some serious thinking and well, I'm stepping down as your admin. For a while now there have been constant issues between me and members and handling members and it has gotten to the point where when I come onto this site, right away I'm stressed out beyond belief. I could be in a good mood the entire day, but when I get on here its like, I don't even have to look at the page or chat box, I'm automatically in a bad mood and I know that has been greatly affecting the way I've handled issues and problems between members and questions that have arose. Honestly, I don't think any of you deserve that in an admin, and yes, I do care about all of you regardless of how some of you may see me. I know I haven't exactly painted a good picture of myself to some of you.

Aside from that, it isn't just the chat issues and the member issues that are the problem. Believe me, I love all of you and I've been on this site for… what has it been, two years? Three? Well, I've suddenly realized how stressed and upset I've been after or during being on this site recently. I can't even pinpoint the problem, it's like a bunch of things mixed into one; the stress of being an admin and trying to help, the stress of feeling like I have to be on everything at once, the time constraints, and then my muse in Rping. I don't even know what to do with myself. I came on here to Rp because it was fun and relaxing to me as a hobby, and now I've come to the realization that hey, I'm feeling the opposite right now so why am I doing this. Yes, I messaged Mid and I need to inform you that I'm planning to leave this site. Soon, in fact, as soon as possible. At the very, very least, I would get rid of all of my cats and maybe keep one or so, but I honestly can't see that happening or working much in my favor. Maybe I've just been Rping cats for too long, or maybe I'm feeling especially down, but me sitting here knowing I have all these responsibilities when I can't handle them is like… not a good feeling. It's like it's just looming over me making me more upset. I want to do things in my spare time because I have fun doing them and it makes me happy.

As a disclaimer, no one at this site is to blame for anything. At all. If you think you did something to cause this, don't think it because it's not true. I have many friends on here and several very close friends on here and I wouldn't be anywhere without you guys. I've also enjoyed Rping here many, many times in the past and have loved the plots. As I've told Mid before, this is the best Rp site I have ever been on, and the reason why I stayed here for over two years. I honestly don't think I've stayed at any site so long as I have here. So, please do not be like "oh my gosh Golden, I'm sorry if I did anything" because you didn't. Also, I'm not doing this for drama. This isn't like one of those "oh my gosh guys I'm leaving" thing so that everyone will reply "Nooo Golden don't leave! oh my gosh I love you love love love love I worship the ground you stand on, oh my gosh I'll give you a million dollars and a pony," either. I only posted this because I feel that you have a right to know why I'm leaving and what happened to me, especially since I've known a lot of you for a long time on this site. It would feel weird to just disappear without a trace, and then everyone would probs worry unnecessarily about whether or not I died somehow, so that's not good. So uh, here this is. I'm not dead nor dying, and I guess I should say goodbye then? *salutes* Goodbye Awrp. (well at least in Roleplay and adminship). I'm sure you'll live many more years. To you members: please don't forget that Rping is supposed to be enjoyable. I probably don't have to remind most of you, since I can only assume that is why you are here, but if there ever comes a time when you feel that things are too upsetting or hectic, try to remember that you are here to have fun, not to stress yourself out about Rping. And… do have fun!

Goldenbird, out.

[Falcon]

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww GOLD I'M GOING TO MISS YOU, YOU WERE A GREAT ADMIN *tackle hug*

[Sand]

Golden you did this once already so I hope one day we can roleplay again. Maybe the same thing will happen again that happened last time when you decided to get rid of all your characters that one time. I don't believe in forever, I lost my believe in forever a long time ago. I'll miss roleplaying with you and hopefully you'll be able to get rid of all the stress but I've never seen you be anything but nice.

[Deleted]

I'm so sorry you have to leave Golden, but if you need a break, you need a break! I'll miss you so much since you were an AMAZING admin, but I just hope you do well, and don't die on us. We don't need you dead forever.

[Midnight]

As sad as I am to see Golden leave, as I expressed this to her in messaging, I understand what she's going through. There have been times where I just wanted to shut down AWRP or hand it off to Acro or Legit, and although I probably wouldn't do either of those things, there were a few instances where I wanted to. Several months ago, I was going through a really rough patch on here (not in real life, just AWRP-specific) where coming here stressed me out and I got irritated the second I went on the chatbox. I just couldn't stand being an admin anymore at that time. It led my best friend to ask me why I even bother keeping the forum around, why don't I shut it down already because I'm not really very into Warriors anymore (slowly getting my muse back) and I have problems with even coming on here.

That time has passed for me, and hopefully it will pass for Golden as well. The best thing that members can do is try their best not to bug the staff (I've had far too many people antagonize me to see what I'd do, and trust me, that definitely leads one to the cliff that is the "Delete forum" button) because we have lives and we do get sick of our jobs every now and then, that's bound to happen. Don't suck up to us (god do I hate people sucking up to me), but don't treat us like shit, either. No specific person was treating anyone like shit in this instance, but what I'm saying here is that type of thing builds up - everything builds up. I'm not pointing fingers, I'm just explaining to you all what Golden's feeling (hopefully I'm doing it right) and what I've felt in the past.

[Ambrose]

I'm really, really upset to see you go, Golden. You'll be missed.
Make sure to call into the chatbox every now and then, for us? Okay?

[Deku]

I can understand why you need to leave Golden, but that doesn't change how much we will miss you.

[ℓυиαя]

Take all the time you need Golden and take care, look after yourself! We will miss you, you did such a great job but all good things must come to an end I guess. Give yourself the time you need to get back to feeling like you again and maybe later on we will see you around. Good Luck!


-Lunar

[Deleted]

I sort of understand how you feel.
I can't say we interacted much, but the times we did the impression I got of you was a friendly admin.
We'll all miss you.

[Avery]

Bye Golden I'll miss you <3 Hope to see you're name online again one day, if not, best of luck!