Keep holding on(Puddle)

[Sand]

A pale brown tabby she-cat sat in the warriors den with her eyes closed. Her eyes opened to reveal green orbs and she let out a sigh. She spent most of her time by herself she didn't really have any friends and most of the time she was so lonely that her heart ached. It seemed that all the cats she ended up caring for ended up leaving her or dying on her and she knew some of them were her fault. Well, none of the deaths were her fault but as for some of the cats she cared for leaving some of that was her fault. She pushed back her feelings and got to her paws wondering what she could do.

She supposed she could find something to help out the clan but she wasn't exactly sure what to do the fresh kill pile seemed well-stocked but she supposed it wouldn't hurt to add some more to the fresh kill pile as long as it was land prey and not fish. She knew that fish didn't really keep well but knew that land prey could stay fresh for a pretty long time. Letting out another sigh she pushed her way out of the the warriors den and looked around letting her green orbs scan the camp to make sure no one needed help with anything. Once she was sure none of her clan mates needed help with anything she headed for the camp exit. She reached the camp exit and pushed her way outside into the territory.

Once in the territory Grassfall started walking figuring she would do a little thinking away from camp before she did anything for the clan. She was usually one to always be trying to help the clan and wasn't usually one for slacking off. but this time she just felt to miserable to really help her clan. She continued walking towards the ocean knowing exactly where she would go. She had started going to the Sunset Island as a way to get away from the clan for a bit to think. She loved her clan but sometimes it was just to hard to think with all the noise in the camp so she had to get away to think. Sunset Island had kind of become her thinking place because of how serene it felt to her.

She reached the beach and came to a halt at the edge of the water. She was glad that it was newleaf because back in leafbare she had rarely come to the island because of how cold the water could get. Flicking her ears back and forth she waded into the water and began to wade to the island. Because of her longer legs she could wade further out than most of her clan mates could before her feet no longer touched the bottom. She only had to swim for what twolegs would call a few minutes before her paws touched ground again and she got onto the island that was known as Sunset Island.

Than she walked away from the shore of the island and headed towards the undergrowth. She began to push her way through the undergrowth wincing as she had to pass through a few thorn bushes. She loved coming to Sunsetclan Island but she didn't like having to fight her way through the undergrowth in order to get to the center of the island which was clear of undergrowth. Once she had fought her way through the undergrowth she let out a sigh of relieve. Than she moved a mouselength away from the undergrowth and laid down resting her head on her paws as she let her mind wander.

She started thinking of all the cats she had lost during her life and let out a sigh. The first cat she had lost was her brother Graykit when she had been a moon old. He had died of greencough when she had been a moon later and she had lost her mother two moons later. Her father had gotten killed by a dog when she had been an apprentice and when she had become a warrior she had lost a lot of cats. Most of the cats she had lost she had been crushing on and it made her wary to trust in the concept of love. She had also lost her other two siblings and she knew the fact that they had run away from Sunsetclan had been her fault.

She could still remember how she had come to argue with her sister Short-tail about taking a mate from another clan and how her brother Smokewhisker had defended Short-tail against her. She had been so angry at her sister for breaking the warrior code that she had said something that she shouldn't have. What she had said to her sister had resulted in her leaving and she had watched as her sister who had been pregnant had left. Than her brother who had been angry at her for what she had yelled at Short-tail had also left. She came out of her thoughts and let out a sigh.

'Oh, what is wrong with me?' she asked herself. 'Why do I either lose the cats I care about or drive them away?" she asked herself. She missed her siblings and her friend Mudwater who had gotten killed by a dog. 'Mudwater why did you have to die you were like a brother to me,' she thought and sat up feeling like her sadness was swamping her. She sometimes didn't see the reason for going on. She felt like every cat she grew close to was destined to die or leave her and those thoughts was exactly why she had began to withdraw from her clan mates. She felt like she would end up being the reason that one of her clan mates died and she didn't want to be the reason that one of her clan mates died.

She let out another sigh and licked her paw drawing it over her ears. Than she began to groom the rest of her fur just wanting to have something to do. She was still grooming her fur when she thought she heard a noise. She frowned pausing in her grooming and looked up. She let her green orbs scan the undergrowth but she didn't see anything. 'Most have been some prey or the wind,' she thought and returned to grooming her fur. She groomed her fur until it shown before moving to clean her face her ears pricked in case someone else decided to come to Sunset Island.

WC: 103
Muse: Extremely high for now
Song(s): Keep holding on(Avriel Lavign)/Breakaway(Kelly Clarkson)
OOC: Felt like it took me forever to type this
Tag: Puddlesdog

[Puddlesdog]

OCC: Sand woah..

Duckstrike was grumpy, that was the best way to put it. He couldn't sleep at all, every twist and turned resulted in an aching muscles. That was what made his shoulder ache with a full blow and his ears ringing. He needed to do something put what was the point, everything was gone. He stifling a moan, why did he let her go? He shook out his fur and stood, time for a walk. Licking his fur in case he met someone he stood and went into camp. The night air hit him face on, nice cold. The tom walked around the camp feeling werid over the small steps the seemed to echo through the forest. He looked at the woods, a longing. He had to go to Sunset Island to see where his mate had taken her last breath. Walking towards the island with a scent of the ocean in his nose, he smiled to himself. Maybe it was time to let go of her.. He reached the ocean. Putting one paw in he paddled toward the distant island. When he reached the shores he shook his fur out, cold. He licked his paws bringing his paw down his head, like he wasn't wet enough already. He smiled at the joke but stopped when he heard foot falls. "Hello? Anyone, don't worry I won't bite." He smiled after the speech, that was the spirit! but really who was there?

[Sand]

After grooming her fur Grassfall had been to restless to just sit around so she had started to walk around hoping that she would get tired. She had come here around sundown and hadn't really realized how dark it had gotten while she had been lost in her own thoughts. It was hard keeping herself from getting lost in her own thoughts especially when her heart always ached so much. She wanted friends, she wanted someone who was something more than a friend but she was always wary of getting close to anyone. She had been doing all she could to push others away so that she wouldn't end up getting close to them.

She thought she heard the sound of another set of pawsteps and her left ear twitched turning towards the sound so she could hear it better. She realized that she had heard pawsteps and she was about to head off towards the sound when she heard the cat call out. She relaxed realizing that it was one of her clan mates and not some rogue trespassing on Sunsetclan territory. She recognized the voice of the cat who had just arrived at Sunset Island not from having talked to him but she had heard him talk to others before so she knew who the tom was. She knew that she should call out to him as well since he had clearly heard her pawsteps.

She knew the tom to be Duckstrike a cat she knew to have just lost his mate. She hated really talked to Duckstrike's mate either. 'I really am worried about being close to someone else but that doesn't mean I have to be rude. Not like he would want to be my friend anyway,' she thought before calling out. "Hopefully not since we're clan mates," Grassfall called out her head turned towards where she had last heard Duckstrike's voice. She wondered if he knew her name after all they had never talked to each other. She only knew his name because she had heard a few other clan mates talking about him.

[Puddlesdog]

Duckstrike looked around as he heard the voice, his fur bristled fast. If laid flat once he heard the voice, it was.. The name was on the bridge of coming to mind. He grunted when he thought and for a moment he saw Emberpelt in the voice. The cat was a she, for sure and.. Grassfall. "Hey Grassfall, it's a good thing I don't bite but I unsure you it wouldn't hurt in the least." He smiled his teeth glinting in the faint moonlight. He wondered how he had come to recall the name, oh Emberpelt had spoken of her once, and he had watched her and supposedly heard her speak. He pushed the thought away, no Emberpelt. "What brought you out tonight? Hope it wasn't because you heard me, because that means I have to go on diet again." He said with a slight chuckle. The tabby walked towards Grassfall, able to make out the faint outline. He tried to stand in the moonlight but it was sheer. He looked at the ocean and sighed, it was pretty. He looked at the moon lite waters and it made a pang start up. Grassfall could be one of the only friends he would have.. Along with Cinderweb, and the few others. This should be a friendship worth while. Emberpelt had said that Grassfall was a sad cat, and what was he? Also a sad cat.. whispered a voice in his head. No! I am a cat to make other cats happy. He turned back the she cat with a grin on his face. 
Sand

[Sand]

"Hey," Grassfall meowed when she saw Duckstrike and she dipped her head to him before hearing what had had to say about him hoping he hadn't woken her up. "No, it wasn't your fault I got here around sundown. I came here to think and hadn't realized how dark it had gotten," she meowed curling her tail over her paws. She knew he was probably still grieving over his mate and she figured that even she needed friends. 'Maybe I should stop withdrawing into myself,' she thought. "I guess I just couldn't turn off my mind," she meowed giving him a rueful smile that didn't reach her eyes.


ooc: short post since I'm a bit distracted.

[Puddlesdog]

Duckstrike looked at the she cat and cocked his head. "Well yes, minds on and off, that happens to me commonly. but in your case maybe it's because you could be smarter then you think." He said flashing her another grin. "I don't know why I left, perhaps because my mind was off." He smiled again, looking at the she cat. This could be fun if she would get into the spirit. The aging tom stood with the old sparkle in his eyes. "Come on lazy! What's out there? I know! Something fun!" He struck out his tail in the direction of the center of the island. He smiled the smile that was real not the 'have a good day' one. Duckstrike got into the crouch and tested his legs, it had been awhile since he had run. Not before she died, he swallowed the lump in his throat. She would want him to toughen up and take this seriously mousebrain! but he was never serious... He laughed to his own content. "Come on!" He called to Grassfall.
Sand

[Sand]

"Yes, it is surprisingly hard to get to sleep if you have a lot of stuff on your mind," Grassfall meowed frowning the tip of her tail twitching slightly. She often had trouble sleeping because of her thoughts and she was kind of getting tired of her thoughts making it hard to get some sleep. She supposed that everyone sometimes had thoughts that kept them from being able to get some sleep. It was just that most of her thoughts made her sad and she did not like feeling said. Sometimes she would rather not have any feelings so that when a cat she cared about left of died on her it wouldn't hurt but she also knew that emotions were a good thing even if it seemed that most of the time she experienced the bad emotions.

When he spoke she was snapped out of her thoughts and she tilted her head to the side. "Yeah, I suppose that makes sense. Sometimes it is like we have to much stuff on our minds to be able to sleep. That is usually the reason behind me unable to sleep but there are somethings that I do that help me clear my mind," she meowed curling her tail over her paws. She didn't want to admit it to herself but she was actually enjoying his company and wasn't even trying to push him away like she had others. 'I guess I'm just so lonely, that I don't feel like pushing my clan mates away anymore,' she thought.

When he told her that he had something fun to do she almost told him that she didn't have fun because of Short-tail. Thinking her sisters name was like another cat had clawed her chest. She knew her sister had joined Stormclan but she had heard from some Stormclan cats that Short-tail had died because of a badgeer attack. 'I don't have anyone to look out for anymore. So doesn't that mean I should let myself have some fun?' she asked herself. 'Yeah, I think I should have some fun. It might help to clear my mind for a bit,' she thought.

"Sure, what exactly do you have in mind?" Grassfall asked him grinning the smile actually touched her eyes a bit like thinking of actually having fun for once had changed her somewhat. She saw him flick his tail towards the center of the island and she looked towards the center of the island. When she returned her attention to Duckstike she saw that he had dropped into a crouch. She suddenly realized that he had been implying that they race and she stretched out each leg not wanting to get cramps in her legs if they planned on running.

[Puddlesdog]

Duckstrike nodded absently, he wasn't paying attention on her only on running. "Glad your happy ." He said with a smile of pleasure. Okay his paws skidding of the dirt underneath his paws, his claws sliding out he smiled. He tilted his head sideways and looked at the she cat. The whole world turned side ways. "Ready?" He said giving a final stretch of his leg. "Set?" He turned his head forward, "Go!" He blasted off. His paws kicking up dirt as his claws clicked against the dirt. He saw the lush plants ahead and stopped with a laugh looking around for Grassfall "That was fun." He said with a smile, most fun I've had in a while. He thought to himself with a frown. Maybe this was his chance to go back to his normal self.
Sand sorry for short post, I am distracted ^_^

[Sand]

Grassfall just nodded when she heard his question and stretched a few more times before looking at him waiting for him to give her the signal to go. She crouched down and nodded when he asked her if she was ready. When she heard the word go she took off running her belly fur skimming the ground as she ran. He slid to a halt right next to Duckstrike. Even thought she had long legs she had tried her best to not pull ahead of the other cat. She had just wanted to enjoy running. She had always enjoyed running but because she thought it would keep her from being a good hunter she rarely did it.

She turned her head towards him when she hard him and nodded. "Yeah, it was pretty fun. I use to run with Short-tail but somehow she always ended up tripping me. She would fall down somehow and I wouldn't be able to swerve or stop in time to avoid falling over her," she meowed with a grin. It was the first time that she had been able to talk about her sister without flinching or growing sad again. She had loved her sister but knew that her sister who she figured was in Starclan would be very unhappy in her for being sad all the time. 'I guess it's time for me to try and be the way I use to again,' she thought.

[Puddlesdog]

Duckstrike smiled as he saw her, but frowned when she talked about her sister. That's what Emberpelt had said! She had lost her sister. The tom looked at the she cat sympathy in his gaze. but he guessed if she could let go so could he. He gritted his teeth as the words came to mind, this would be torture. "Emberpelt and I used to run like that to places and see who was the fastest, but we always tied." He meowed simply swallowing the hard lump in his throat. 'Its time to get over Emberpelt,' he looked at the stars, 'because she is still here, and will always be.' The tom lowered his gaze back to the she cat. "That was the most fun I've had in a while!" He said with so much excitement it practically knocked him over. "What's there to hunt on this island?" He said in a low tone, to not scare of the few morsels. He kept his claws out and looked around, turning his head right then left. Suddenly, a caw was heard to the right, he nodded in the direction and leaned close. "Ladies first." He said withdrawing. He looked at her with an encouraging smile, watching her carefully he started flicking his ears to catch anything else except the bird. He withdrew his gaze from Grassfall and Duckstrike closed his eyes trying to get a noise, there! A soft scuttling a few feet away, he flicked his tail in the direction and started stalking towards it.
Sand

[Sand]

"My who family has either died or left and if it wasn't for me Short-tail and Smokewhisker would have never left," Grassfall meowed quietly. She turned her head towards him when she heard the question about prey. She opened her mouth to answer the question but before she could she heard the caw of a bird. Frowing she dropped into a crouch and swiveled her ears and scented the air at the same time to pinpoint where the bird was. Once she pinpointed where the bird was she began to stalk towards it. She kept her steps light as she stalked towards the bird as to not make any noise. She finally saw the bird and pounced landing on top of it. She nipped its spine killing it and she looked it over realizing that it was a magpie.

[Puddlesdog]

Duckstrike leaped forward and caught the mouse in his jaws. With a quick snap to the neck to mouse was dead, he smiled. Quickly he walked over to where Grassfall was, he hated being alone. "Here." He said dropping the mouse on the ground. "Oh no." He said shaking his head. Quickly he unsheathed his claws and dug a hole, he grabbed the mouse and dropped it in. "That's better." He said turning to his claws, they were smothered in the dirt. He looked at Grassfall and made the first decision over someone in a while. She is more important then the dirt. Gritting his teeth he sheathed his claws , some of the dirt fell off but the rest went with his claws. Turning back to Grassfall he frowned, "No, it wasn't your fault. Don't blame yourself for things you didn't do. Unless you marched up to them and shouted go away and made them go away , then supposedly I suppose it was your fault." He smiled at the supposedly suppose sentence. He turned serious again, "You didn't turn them away, they made the decision. And may I say that was a bad decision on their side." He looked at her with sympathy on his eyes. "I would blame myself for Emberpelt's death," he paused sucking in a breath. "but it was her time I decided, it was the snakes fault, and probably not even." The swallowed and looked away. "but being honest with myself I know it's Emberpelt's fault for not telling anyone." He said with a frown. Had he just said one of his greatest secrets to a friend? He sighed, it was anything to make her feel better.
Sand

[Sand]

Grassfall buried her magpie and looked at him when he said it wasn't her fault unless she had yelled at them to go away. She flinched and looked down. "I wish it was something like that if I had told them just to go away I wouldn't feel so bad," she meowed frowning. "I was mad at Short-tail for breaking the code for taking a mate from another clan and I've never been one to keep my thoughts to myself. I started arguing with Short-tail about it and just kept getting madder and madder. "I don't know what made me say, I was just so mad that I said the first thing that popped into my mom. I told her that if it wasn't for her that our parents and our other brother would still be alive. She got mad and ran off, my brother who had witnessed the whole argument yelled at me for what I had just said before running off," she meowed frowning. "I regret saying what I did and I've always wanted to take back those words. When I told Ratstar about the argument she told me not to blame myself but I can't help it," she meowed. When he spoke of his mate Emberpelt she looked up and listened to what her had to say. "I'm sorry that your mate had to die," she meowed.

[Puddlesdog]

Duckstrike looked at her his green eyes burning. "Why did they do that?! Now I know for sure it wasn't your fault." He stopped taking a deep breath. He sat down from the pacing, "It wasn't your fault that she got a mate in another clan. It was her fault, she was a drama queen. She ran away from anger at you for not understanding." He paused cocking his head. "She was mad at you and you were mad at her, you were eventually going to clash. There was nothing you could do." The tom straightened his head and gritted his teeth. "but your brother was just a mouse-brain to mess with your fight. Maybe we or I mean you.. Could find your sister." He ended with a smile. He shook his head and puffed out his fur, making him look like a huge gray fluff ball. "Thank you. I enjoy the kind response." He flattened his fur, and saw the ocean and a grin fell on his face. "Hey, you see that water? Want to go for a dip?" He said casually, but his heart was pounding inside his rib-cage like a bird frantic to get out of its cage. He looked at the she-cat and cocked her head. "I understand you sorrow, I hope you feel better, but why not take your mind of it?" He smiled and swayed his tail back in forth.
Sand

[Sand]

"A stormclan cat said my sister died in a badger attack apparently a kit was heading to the nursery entrance and she got in front of him and shoved him away from the den entrance. Than the badger bit her leg, she died of some disease the badgers have. You know when I heard that I was surprised. Not because my sister died but more of the fact that my sister actually shoved a kit. Even if she was trying to save the kit my sister was never one to be rude. As a kit I was the rude one any my sister was the perky one. My sister was always a bit gullible believing every rumor she heard and I bet you that tom she fell in love with used that to his advantage," Grassfall meowed frowned.

"I want to meet my nephew you though," she meowed flicking her ears back and forth as she thought of her nephew who she had heard Stormclan cats talking about. Of course she hadn't let anyone know that she was the cats aunt because she didn't really feel like having a lot of questions thrown her way. "My sister wasn't really selfish just a bit gullible and kind of sensitive. when we were apprentices so one said she could be mistaken as a rabbit because of her size and tail and she cried the rest of the day even though the other apprentice was only joking. My brother didn't really understand jokes either and I had to stop him from attacking the other apprentice," she meowed with a shake of her head. "I tried making my brother less serious at least so that he could understand jokes but everything I did failed it was kind of amusing really," she meowed with a shake of her head. "Don't be to harsh about what my siblings did I knew Short-tail was sensitive and I knew how Smokewhisker took some things," she meowed frowning.

When he asked her about going for a swim the frown disappeared and she was smiling again. "Yes, I would love that. I love swimming my brother never seemed to like swimming them. One time I found him sleeping on the beach and I caught a fish and threw it on top of him. He thought he was being attacked until he realized it was only a fish," she meowed amused. "I never liked playing around much but I liked startling my brother," she meowed with a shrug. "Anyway lets go for a swim, last one in is a rotten fish," she meowed before charging towards the water.