Momma, Why Did You Leave Me? (Neppy)

[Falcon]

Adderstep padded into the warriors den feeling very tired... his mate had just given birth to his first litter of kits, thankfully they were healthy, but he was worried that he wouldn't be a good father, his mother had died when he was young and his father didn't speak with him anymore, what if he did the same thing? He laid down curling into his nest and closing his eyes, seeking the peace of sleep Nepeta

[Nepeta]

Fawnfeather paced on her cloud. A cat muttered if she did so any more, she might just fall through. She ignored the comment and peered down to her son, Adderstep. Sighing, she waited for him to fall asleep.

As he did so, Fawnfeather entered his dreams. I white haze made up most of it, but Fawnfeather's white and starred pelt was clearly distinguishable. She put on a smile and padded slowly toward Adderstep's dream self. "Adderstep? Adderstep? My dear, do please answer me..." She said, paddding closer. She stopped at a fair distance, unsure what Adderstep's reaction to seeing her after so long would be.

[Falcon]

Adderstep eyes opened slowly stretching sleepily "hmm?" he looked around though the whiteness before he spotted Fawnfeather in the distance "Momma? What are you doing here?" he looked around again "also where is here?" he stayed where he was sitting "Am I dead?" he look confused, he didn't feel sick or anything

[Nepeta]

Fawnfeather chuckled. "No, my dear. This is your dream. I've come to visit you." She purred, padding closer. "I know you have a lot of questions, Adderstep. You must. I need you to know I cannot answer all of them, but I can answer a few. So, Ask away." She said, now laying beside him. Licking her chest fur casually, she then intently stared into his eyes, waiting for many questions.

[Falcon]

He opened his mouth, wondering just where to start "Why did you leave me?" it hadn't been the first question to come to mind but it was the first one his heart wanted to ask "no cat understood me like you did, they picked on me and called me names, and the only one to protect me was you, but without you I was alone, Papa didn't talk to me, not even after I became his apprentice, why did you leave me alone!"

[Nepeta]

Fawnfeather winced, her heart aching. "I... I didn't leave you, dear... It wasn't my choice. It was my time to go and..." She then made her voice a whisper. "I'm sorry... I'm so, so sorry Adderstep... I just thought that... I thought you'd be okay... If I'd known, I would have fought harder..." She whispered, her eyes becoming teary. "H-how about Fangpaw?" She asked him, now hesitantly scooting away.

[Falcon]

He shrugged a little "she's managing, she misses you too Papa doesn't really take an interest in any of us anymore I guess he's to busy with his new mate to worry about his litter of screw ups" feeling a bitterness he hadn't realized he possessed bubble up inside him he took a deep breath "I don't want to end up like him, I don't want to abandon my kits, but... I don't know how to be a good Papa"

[Nepeta]

Fawnfeather relaxed a bit and smiled. "My dear Adderstep, You'll be a great father. When I made Icepelt my mate, I envisioned him a good father... I guess I was blinded by my love for him. I'm sorry I left you alone with him." She said. "but it's not that hard. You just have to be there for them... Keep them warm... Pick them up when they fall..." She smiled with a warmness now, remembering when her kits were first born. "Oh, and that Applestrike? I like her -- She's like you in a way... She'll be a wonderful mother, I'm sure." She purrs. "I wish I could've been here to meet your kits..." Fawnfeather sighs as she says this. "Maybe I'll meet them in their dreams, hmm?" She asks the rhetorical question, smiling with a sadness now.

[Falcon]

Adderstep didn't look very convinced "but I don't know how to do any of that stuff what if I mess up? or what if they're afraid of me" he shuffled his paws, though he had long since grown used to his twisted jaw, every stare or fearing flinch was imprinted on his mind

[Nepeta]

Fawnfeather smiled encouragingly. "My dear, You'll do fine. And if you don't, I'll come to visit you again..." She then raised her head and looked up. "I believe it's nearly time to take my leave, dear. I wish you the best. Oh, and I'll be visiting your kits... Kits are quite honest, you know. Don't you dare mistreat them!" She teased. With that, she lifted her body and slowly padded away, without waiting for a reply. She started to fade from view when she called "See you soon, Adderstep!"

[Falcon]

Adderstep's eyes filled with moons of unshed tears "G-Goodbye Momma" he watched her go suddenly the lump of emotion in his throat vanished and he leapt up running after her "I love you Momma! We all do! I'll tell them all about you, I'll tell them about your kindness, your love, and soft fur. I'll tell them about the butterflies, I'll tell them how you picked me up when I fell, how you were there whenever I needed you, I'll tell them everything, they'll know your name and they'll know how perfect you were" he stopped at the edge of his dream continuing to watch her go, but still speaking "every time you gave me the courage to go outside, every time we laid together at night whispering stories. They'll hear about it all, and you won't be a stranger to them, they'll know about Fawnfeather, the best Momma any old twisted up tom could ask for" he didn't even seem to be aware of the tears falling from his eyes as he yelled as loud as he could, hoping that she somehow could still hear him "They'll know! and they'll love you nearly as much as I do! ...Momma....