Risen from (Ash), I can hear your (Echo) [TAGGED]

[Heron]

The temperature was rather warm for the early greenleaf season, and one cat in particular had taken advantage of the steady sunlight and comforting breeze that set across the vast hills and fields of her clan. She had perched herself among the welcoming flowers, abundant early in the season and desperate to escape the coldness of the ground. It was somewhat damp and chilly beneath her paws, but the warmth on her pelt was enough to convince the young she-cat that the harsh leafbare was truly over.

She had gotten thinner with the raging sickness and scarce prey. Her white pelt, mottled with blue-gray stripes, seemed a bit dull. Her usual healthy shine had been replaced with a thickness in a desperate attempt to keep in any sort of body heat. It was something she envied her mentor for each time the snow fell. The thickness of his pelt was inviting, and too often she found herself daydreaming about slipping close enough to him that his fur became her own. 


It was dangerous to think such a thing. Her mentor was everything she could admire about a warrior. Whisperclan was surely lucky to have him, and his patience with her was outstanding. When he had grown ill, Echopaw had nearly lost her mind. She was certain Starclan had been working against her-- another attempt to prove to her she hadn't what it took to become a warrior in Whisperclan. When he got better, her heart had soured, and she unleashed realities on herself each time she worked with him slowly but surely. Her hunting had gotten better. Her fighting. She felt different, too. Stronger. Perhaps wiser and wittier. Her tongue was never quite sharp, but she still gained experience in knowing what to say and knowing when to say it. She was still calm and collected and observant. No amount of training could deplete the instincts that came drilled with being born partially deaf.


Deaf. Her ears, too, had gotten a tad bit worse. She failed to mention it to her mentor, not quite sure he ever really took notice. If he did, she hadn't heard anything from him like concern. She was a true artist in concealing it-- how her good ear didn't seem very good at all these days. It was a nightmare. How could she ever expect to receiver her warrior name with her condition? What would her mentor think of all his hard work on her gone to waste? So she concealed it, and it brought her here to the butterfly garden. 

Wallowing between the flowers, her green gaze followed the butterflies as they softly flapped their wings and visited each flower that interested them. She had no idea if they knew she was even there. Perhaps they were simply being kind enough to allow her to stay and watch. The scent around her was masked by the flowery aroma, but she knew she would have a visitor soon. She was sure when she slipped from camp that he had seen her, and she knew he would follow obediently.
   

He always seemed to know what she wanted before she even said it. She was never talkative, but Ashfrost took it farther than that. He had somewhat become an extension of her own self, and it quite frightened her to think he might never speak to her if she received a ceremony. Would he feel obligated to speak to her? Mentors and apprentices always had tight relationships, but then mentors got new apprentices to replace the old. What would become of her? Of them? There were fleeting moments when he looked at her with a rare expression, something she only saw when he allowed it. She'd seen it other places, too-- on the face of other cats looking at their mates. At their family. She'd studied other mentors and the way they looked at their apprentices -- always with fondness, but not the admiration she could sometimes catch in Ashfrost's gaze.


Worse, she didn't know how it made her feel. She knew her heart soured at the thought of him, but he brought her both sadness and joy. Their relationship was coming to a close as mentor and apprentice, and if she weren't so bent on becoming a warrior she might've considered stalling her training to spend more time with him. While she waited in the garden, she contemplated what she would say to him. Tell him about her fading hearing -- or her feelings?

Rogue 

[Rogue]

As soon as she had slipped out of camp, Ashfrost had known that she wanted him to follow. He wasn't quite sure how he knew, there was just a tug in his heart that traveled down to his paws, and the next thing he knew he was padding through the long grass of WhisperClan's meadows. After moons of being brown and dead, the grass was finally green and lush once again, and the grey-spotted warrior breathed in the warm greenleaf air. After such a leafbare riddled with sickness and despair, the bright sunshine and colorful flowers that had sprouted in the meadows almost made it seem like StarClan was smiling down at them.

A shadow flickered across Ashfrost's face at the thought of leafbare. He had been a victim of the greencough epidemic, at one point growing so weak that he had begun to fear the worst. He had almost come to terms with his death, the thought that he would soon be reunited with his mother comforting him, when the one cat who could save him had arrived in the medicine cat's den. Echopaw had been like a ray of light amongst the darkness, and while he wished she would have stayed away simply because of the risk of infection, seeing her had made him realize that he couldn't die. There was no Echopaw in StarClan, and he wanted to be wherever she was.

Such a thought was risky, of course. Mentors and their apprentices were usually close, but not this close. What he and Echopaw had seemed to stretch beyond those boundaries, and it simultaneously excited him and frightened him. He had never been this close to a cat before, ever. Every cat that he had gotten close to over the course of his short life had left him in one way or another, except for Echopaw. Having her by his side was beginning to become a regular thing, and he had grown to depend on her company. She filled his thoughts and was one of the few reasons why he bothered to get out of his nest every morning. When he was with her, the pain in his heart faded. She was everything.

Which brought him to the problem of her apprenticeship, which was quickly nearing its end. He had taught Echopaw everything he knew, and she was more than ready to become a warrior, whether she knew it or not. Once she received her name, she would no longer need him. She would go off on her own path and quickly leave him behind, making new friends and perhaps even finding a young tom who deserved her gentle heart and fiery determination. The thought of Echopaw with someone else caused a thorn of envy to strike Ashfrost's heart, only deepening his concern. He had gotten too close to the flames and was now consumed by them, and the worst part was, he didn't think he wanted to jump out.

The butterfly Gardens came into view as he crested a hill, and his heart began to speed up at the sight of Echopaw sitting amongst the blossoms and butterflies, seeming at place with the beauty. Her blue-striped pelt stood out like a beacon among the splash of color, and he made his way down the slope toward her, his heart beating even faster. What should he say? Should he keep cool and aloof like he often did, to spare himself the pain of loving her? Or should he admit to her what he was feeling, how she padded through his dreams and made him feel like his was a soul worth saving?

Heron

[Heron]

As he descended the hill, the breeze blowing down to the bottom where she lay in the garden had alerted her of his presence. Her ears pricked forward and she turned her head, finding it in her heart to smile sweetly in greeting. She stood suddenly, the flowers pressing against her and the butterflies fluttering with the new excitement. They twirled around her head for several moments before they took place on their favorite flowers once more. Maybe they were silent watchers themselves, and Echopaw felt like scolding them for eyeing her and Ashfrost like they were some sort of spectacle about to unfold. Her heart fluttered at the sight of him. After his close call with death, she felt as though every time she looked at him she was looking at some sort of miracle.

"Hello," she purred happily, not bothering to contain her joy in seeing him. She was right when she believed he would follow her, never failing in her trust. As he stalked closer, she turned back her attention toward the butterflies. They were rather still, and she decided that they were definitely watching. As if they knew. Her gaze flickered back to her mentor, afraid he might speak and she wouldn't hear him well. She pressed her belly back against the damp ground, eyes sparkling uncontrollably. "It's beautiful today."

She could only comment lightly, afraid she might say something suddenly foolish or out of place. Why couldn't her heart stop fluttering? She'd been around him so often, but it suddenly seemed like every encounter was a building bridge to what led to this. Her ceremony would be soon, and she hoped everything would be okay between them. Should she start by saying thank you? Thank you didn't seem like enough. Starclan, help me. Echopaw leaned down to give her chest a bashful lick, keeping her gaze lowered. Her body radiated a nervous heat, and if Ashfrost was like any other tom, he would recognize the shift in her scent in his presence.

She looked at him again, and the butterflies sprung from their flowers and fluttered about. His dark spotted pelt, his long fur, his healthiness was the epitome of her happiness. She would never again take him for granted, and the young she-cat was suddenly realizing, with a jolt, that Ashfrost had to be constant in her life. To lose him would surely mean to lose herself. but how could she let him know? How could she admit her fears, her feelings, her confusion? Oh, how she had grown since she first met him. She was better at words, better at conveying what she felt. Better at keeping her calm and keeping her head clear. but now, she felt as muddled as the pack of butterflies while they flew; each thought as indistinguishable as the one before it, the very same way the butterflies blended together in a flutter.

[Rogue]

Echopaw's nervous mannerisms as he drew closer piqued his interest, and he found himself wondering if she was as nervous as he was. Perhaps she could sense his shift in mood as he neared her, could see the softening in his usually hard green gaze. She was the only cat who could ever punch through his frosty exterior, and he was forever grateful that she had. Even if she moved on with her life after her ceremony, her mark on him would remain, whether she knew it or not. As he looked at her, surrounded by the blazing colors of the flowers, he knew that even if she did choose to forget him, he would never forget her.

"It is beautiful," he agreed, though he wasn't looking up at the sky. He was still looking at her, wanting to drink in her appearance so that it would be burned into his memory forever. Great StarClan, but the cat who will some day be yours won't even know how lucky he is.

"Your ceremony is soon," he said quietly, drawing closer to her so that his long fur brushed her own short pelt. He didn't know why he needed to be in contact with her at the moment; perhaps then he could delude himself into thinking that he could hold her here in this moment, suspended with him forever. "I just..." Tell her! "I just want you to know how proud I am of you."

For the first time in a long time, Ashfrost found himself at a loss for words. He wanted to tell her how much she meant to him, how he didn't want her to leave him ever, but he couldn't seem to force it out. His had been a tragic existence, and he had come out damaged because of it. What if he was incapable of giving her the love that she desired? That she deserved? There were so many 'what ifs', and all of them frightened him. She deserves so much better than me.

[Heron]

bic//

Echopaw savored his presence as he pressed close to her, and she prepared herself for the soft touch of his fur. She kept her gaze low and shy, quite unlike her as of lately. However, when he brought up her ceremony, she peered up at him with a look of appreciation and thankfulness. "I know," she said softly-- gently, as though speaking too loud might scare him away. She felt her heart soar at his declaration of pride, and she leaned into him. Why deny herself quite possibly her last chance of relishing in his soft fur and his warmth? She didn't know when she would get this again, or if he would disappear like they hadn't existed together at all. "I just want you to know how proud I am of you."

She hid her face in his long fur, deciding it would be easier to talk to the gray than to his face directly. "Thank you," she breathed into his pelt. "You've done so much for me." It didn't seem like enough. How could she phrase her emotions so perfectly that he could understand? Her emotions had no true end, so how could she find the right things to say and try to contain them all? She was silent for quite a while, basking in his presence and the safety he gave her. Yes, he made her feel so safe. And he had believed in her. He had never abandoned her. He had always been truthful, and strong. Strong like when he fought the greencough. When he fought for his life.

She pulled away after quite a few moments and looked at him with a face of true determination, and true courage. She would say it now. She would say it. She could be truthful -- he was about to become her fellow warrior. She owed him, didn't she? Suddenly she pulled back, already longing for his softness. Her own pelt seemed to ache in protest, but she willed herself to ignore the desire. Not bearing to look at him, she stood and took a few steps away from Ashfrost, her gaze turned to the ground. Her eyes shut and she decided to just speak, knowing full well she may not hear him - if he intervened - now that she was turned away.

"My...I'm afraid...I've been keeping something from you. I'm sorry." she started, shaking her head slowly. "My hearing is fading, and my good ear is hardly well. I already can tell the difference. I'm not sure if I'm going to lose my hearing completely..." The young she-cat couldn't help the grief, the self-pity in her heart. Face this like a warrior! Her chin lifted slightly. "but I will do my best- to - to be the warrior you trained me to be. I'm going to fight for as long as I can." Echopaw opened her eyes and turned her head to look back at him, her body stiff and still with anxiety. "I'm not going to give up, but I understand if you feel...if you feel like this was a waste of time."

[Rogue]

OOC: The perfect song for these two actually came on 8tracks as I was writing this and it gave me so many feels T.T

---

"My hearing is fading, and my good ear is hardly well. I already can tell the difference. I'm not sure if I'm going to lose my hearing completely..."

Ashfrost was silent as Echopaw admitted to him that her hearing was getting worse, her voice as fragile as the butterflies that were fluttering around their heads. He could see the fear in her green eyes, and he somehow knew that she was afraid he'd be disappointed or even angry at her. He shook his head and then leaned in, giving her forehead a quick lick. "If your hearing goes away completely, then we'll deal with it then," he told her, meeting her gaze. "I taught you how to fight without one ear, and I can teach you how to fight without two. I won't abandon you." Ever.

The grey-spotted warrior paused for a moment, suddenly aware of how loud his heart was beating. Now was the perfect time to tell her, but he wasn't sure if he could. You have to. What if you never get another chance? He couldn't let her walk away without knowing. He thought about his mother and his mentor, two cats who were so dear to him, there one day and gone the next. He had never gotten the chance to express to either of them his gratitude or his love, and it had haunted him his entire life. He couldn't let that happen again. He wouldn't.

"You remember how I told you about my past," he began slowly, his voice shakier than he had ever remembered it to be. He felt small again, and suddenly he was a kit, running away and leaving his mother to die. And then he was an apprentice, too scared to move and allowing his mentor to die in his stead. Then he was lying in the medicine cat's den, body wracked with greencough. Echopaw's words flashed through his mind, quicker than a bolt of lightning. "I think StarClan is punishing me, and they're using you to do it..."

No, he thought to himself as he looked at her. StarClan isn't punishing you. Each of those times I survived. StarClan kept me here, and they kept me here for you.

"Every time I've gotten close to someone, they've left me in some way," Ashfrost continued, his voice stronger and steadier now. "And with your warrior ceremony approaching, I can't help but be afraid that you'll leave too. I don't want you to leave, Echopaw. I...I need you to stay." He swallowed hard. "I need you." Those other words hung on his tongue, refusing to leave the safety of his mouth, but he managed to force them out.

"I love you."

[Heron]

"I taught you how to fight without one ear, and I can teach you how to fight without two. I won't abandon you."

Echopaw did not blink under his heavy gaze and during his affectionate lick, her stiff body too nervous to move. Did her ears truly deceive her? It was too true to believe that Ashfrost - Ashfrost - could be treating her with such kindness and gentleness. True, he had always been this way, but she knew that his exterior had a reputation about the clan. Could she be so lucky as she hold the stony warrior's admiration so fondly? Her skin heated with a bit of fluster, and the young she-cat turned her gaze away. What could she say to him now?

She didn't get a chance to find out. Already he was speaking again, this time more hesitantly that it made her look up in curiosity. His past? She grew very still, hoping she wouldn't so much as breathe the wrong way and allow him to put up the icy wall around his heart. She understood him and the way he worked, and in that moment she wanted to be the one licking him encouragingly. Echopaw merely nodded her head, holding each of his words against her heart. "And with your warrior ceremony approaching, I can't help but be afraid that you'll leave too. I don't want you to leave, Echopaw.

Now, the apprentice leaned forward to press her muzzle affectionally against his. A deep, throaty purr emerged from her throat. How could she have been so blind to see that his fears were her fears? That he loved her, too? Yes, this is what it is. Love. She hadn't allowed herself to truly consider it, but how could she not when their love had blossomed between them so naturally? And to think she had been afraid of her own feelings! Her purr grew louder as he confessed his love, and Echopaw was so shocked that she was starting go fuzzy in the head. She pulled away from him and smiled sweetly-- though she wished she could quite literally jump for joy.

Her memories took her back to when they had first met, and he had thrown himself at a badger to protect her. When his face became permanently scarred, like a visible memory of what kind of cat he truly was. A brave, self-sacrificing tom that needed protecting, too. And she would. The she-cat pressed her nose against his and then gave the top of his muzzle a quick lick. She swallowed thickly. "I love you, too." Her voice was soft but definite. Though her future still scared her, she was relieved (and lucky) that Ashfrost would always be there next to her. "I will be a warrior for you. I will always be here for you. I won't - I can't - ever leave you, Ashfrost."

[Rogue]

When Echopaw didn't deny him and instead returned his expression of love, it felt like a huge weight had been lifted off of his shoulders. His entire body felt light, as if he could suddenly lift off of the ground and fly away. For a moment he was speechless, thinking he had imagined her saying that. but then the touch of her nose to his brought him back to reality, and he looked into her emerald gaze and saw the affection there, and his heart soared.

She loved him. She really loved him.

A rumbling purr exploded from his chest, the loudest one he had ever heard himself make. He strange forward and pressed his muzzle to Echopaw's, squeezing his eyed shut and listening to the hard thudding of his heart. "I was so afraid you didn't feel the same," he admitted, his voice full of raw emotion. "I mean, I'm not the warmest or the most handsome tom in the Clan." His thoughts flickered briefly to the ugly scar above his right eye.

"but," he added slowly, his voice very soft. "I have a lifetime of love to give you."